Why don’t kids come with a manual? Sure there are plenty of books and other resources, but they can be confusing. There’s so much contradicting advice. Plus, every kid, parent, and life situation is different. When things finally settle a little something changes. The good news is that I am going to share the best parenting advice ever. This needs to not be a secret. Let’s make sure parents everywhere know!
Pursuit of the Best Parenting Advice
We all want what’s best for our kids. I do, and I know you do as well. Otherwise you wouldn’t be here. So, when things get rough, we go on a hunt for all the answers. We want to solve problems and provide our kids with everything they need to succeed. Maybe Dr. Google is consulted when new symptoms appear. When someone has recurring tantrums or emotional breakdowns we try everything. Part of this is hunting down all the experts for the best parenting advice in those areas. This is what it takes to succeed as a parent, right?
Yes, it is important to become knowledgeable and educated about the needs of our children. It’s even better when we seek information from reliable sources, either professionals or veteran parents like that trusted grandmother. However, there’s more. This next piece is all too often overlooked.
The Motherhood Trap
By nature, mothers are wired to pour into their children. Otherwise the human race never would have survived this long. Throughout history there have been so many times mothers needed to put the needs of their children above their own. The younger generations carry on. This is great, but the the concept has gone off track in modern society.
In the United States today, thankfully, most families are not literally fighting to live every single day. Of course, there are exceptions, and Americans face many challenges. I don’t want to downplay those situations, but that’s not what I’m talking about here. I’m talking about the balance of wellbeing and modern societal pressures.
Perhaps you can relate to this.
Picture a family with a primary breadwinner, the father. The mother may or may not have a job. If she does, it’s not her dream career. Or maybe it is but she’s constantly pulled away from it. That career (reality or planned) took a backseat to focus on the kids. They needed her when they were babies and her role at home is just as vital today. She cherishes her role… and there’s more.
Somewhere along the road it became a pattern. She put herself last over and over again. The needs of the kids, supporting her husband and his career, everything else came first. This has become her role. It’s to the point where she feels guilty every time she does something for herself.
Things can spiral out of control.
This is the motherhood trap. It doesn’t have to be this way. Actually, a depleted mother and the pattern of self-sacrifice is detrimental to everyone. It most directly hurts the mother. Beyond that, it negatively impacts the kids and the entire family. This can be seen in family interactions when mom just can’t deal with it anymore. She doesn’t show up the way she could if her cup were filled, of course. She can’t possibly do it all constantly for years and years. No one can.
There’s also more to it than that. Kids see what life is like for mom. They see what she does, how she lives her life, all of it. The concept of coming last is passed down to little girls. Daughters grow up to be mothers who pour everything into their kids. Sons grow up to be fathers who are so used to the status quo that they don’t know how to get away from it. This problem is passed down to the next generation.
Can you see how this becomes a cycle that hurts mom, kids, the family, and society?
The Best Parenting Advice to Break the Cycle
Mom needs a break, yes. That can happen too, and it should. More importantly, mom needs a deeper purpose. I’m not just talking about a fulfilling career, though that certainly can check the box. All she really needs is something to make her jump out of bed every morning with excitement. She deserves to rest her head on the pillow every night feeling complete.
You may be thinking motherhood alone should do that for her. Yes, motherhood in general, but not what it has all too often become. There’s nothing fulfilling about chasing the fake life that comes up with internal and external pressures. The messages about being that perfect mom that does everything Pinterest worthy and with the flawless Instagram feed is stealing joy from motherhood. That’s why the best parenting advice is to find and pursue life purpose.
The Best Parenting Advice Ever: Find and Pursue Life Purpose
For the sake of yourself, your kids, your family, mothers everywhere, and the fate of society, find your thing. Then do it. What lights you up and sets your heart on fire? This can be anything as long as you love it. It can involve the kids or even be a piece of parenting.
Maybe it’s nutrition. This can involve growing a garden at home or preparing healthy meals for the family. Don’t like cooking or dirt? No problem. It can be a career in an industry you’re passionate about. Maybe advancing technology to combat world issues is your thing. That’s amazing, and there are so many opportunities. Perhaps you would rater get involved in your local government, do something at your kids’ school, or volunteer at an organization that means something to you.
The details don’t matter as long as it’s a passion of yours. This is the key. Never look elsewhere to find your life purpose. All the answers are within you. Find them. Follow them. Practice them daily. Show your kids how to really live. With your kids and your passion, be the shift the world needs.
The Time and Energy Fear
Our true passions are energizing. They are special enough for us to find a way without becoming more depleted. It’s the opposite, actually. They fill our cups. They create energy. Productivity increases. It all stems from the mind. When the mind is thriving by living in life purpose everything else melts away and falls in line. On the other hand, when we feel frustrated about not having something special, it’s draining.
I know how hard it can be to even consider adding something else when life as it is feels so overwhelming. That is when it is needed the most. Funny how that works, right? Let me explain. It doesn’t have to be anything big. Actually, it should be very, very small when life feels overwhelming. The process can start by making time to think about the possibilities, to let the magic in. Maybe try setting aside just five minutes per week to think about what you really want. Take all the time needed.
Time To Find and Pursue Life Purpose
So, what now? Do you have ideas and plans to do what you need to do for yourself. No pressure, of course. You know yourself better than anyone else. Just make sure that when you ask yourself what you want and need you answer based on yourself. Don’t answer what you think anyone else would want, including society. This is your life. You deserve to live it the way you want to.
Not sure how to get started?
Click here to learn 7 Simple Steps to Find Life Purpose.
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I’ve got your back, and I’m cheering for you every step of the way!
This blog post is about purpose (finding life purpose as the best parenting advice ever). Here are more blog posts related to the word ‘purpose’ (but not as the best parenting advice ever) from other sites:
Why Purpose Is a Lifelong Promise by Dianne Vielhuber
https://simplewordsoffaith.com/wp-admin/post.php?post=11063&action=edit
Is There Purpose in Pain? by Sharla Hallett
www.sharlahallett.com/is-there-purpose-in-pain/
What Happens When Your Purpose is a Disappointment? by Lori Shoaf